Walks with My Daughter

One weekend several months ago, my daughter kept asking me if we could take our dog, Birdie, on a walk. As you can imagine, as full-time working parents with two elementary-aged children, our weeks and our weekends tend to have a lot of activity to coordinate. Although a walk with Birdie sounded really nice, there were a lot of other projects that “just had to be done.” Abby didn’t give up though, she would just ask me now and again, “Can we go on that walk with Birdie?” “Mommy, when are we going to walk Birdie?”

I remember standing in the kitchen between trips to the laundry when Abby walked up once again and sweetly asked, “Mommy, can we take Birdie on a walk?” I think I sighed and with a somewhat frustrated breath said something about all of the different things we needed to get done and apologized for how busy we were. Her shoulders lowered a little, and she said, “OK,” while walking away. For the first time, I had looked at her when she asked me about walking the dog. I stopped and asked her, “Abby, do you really want to walk the dog or is it that you really want to talk to me?” My little nine-year-old looked up at me with her big brown eyes and said, “Both.” Teary-eyed Mommy immediately dropped everything and said, “Let’s go now!”

Thank God, I finally listened. As much as I love my dog and walks with her, there were so many “things” that needed to be done over the weekend. There just didn’t seem to be time. But this wasn’t really about walking the dog; it was about my daughter. If I had stopped long enough to be honest, I would have realized there is time for it all. The “things” are not totally important, the ones we love are.

Thank God, I finally listened. Abby asking me to walk the dog that day felt like some sort of request for child entertainment akin to can I play with glitter, can I make this 98-step jewelry kit that requires a hot glue gun, can you take me to Chuck E. Cheese, etc. I wasn’t listening. I wasn’t paying attention to the way she was asking me. I didn’t realize that Abby didn’t know how to say, “I need some time with you to talk.”

Thank God, I finally listened. My little girl needed to establish a way to connect with me that included her unique independence while gaining some perspective from a trusted source. I didn’t think about how a walk with Birdie and mom would give her special time to talk during a fun activity that both took off the pressure of a sit down heart-to-heart and also didn’t include little brother and daddy.

Thank God, I finally listened because she still asks me to go on walks with Birdie.

My own daddy, who worked more hours than I can imagine took time to walk to the end of the street and back with me and my sisters when he got home before the sun set. We all remember the watermelon swing, the trampoline at the end of the street and the turn back up the hill. We still call him to talk because he listens.

Dear God, Sometimes we really need to stop and listen. Please give us the strength and compassion to do so with our whole hearts. Thank you for this great gift!

With love and light,

LT