Walks with My Daughter

One weekend several months ago, my daughter kept asking me if we could take our dog, Birdie, on a walk. As you can imagine, as full-time working parents with two elementary-aged children, our weeks and our weekends tend to have a lot of activity to coordinate. Although a walk with Birdie sounded really nice, there were a lot of other projects that “just had to be done.” Abby didn’t give up though, she would just ask me now and again, “Can we go on that walk with Birdie?” “Mommy, when are we going to walk Birdie?”

I remember standing in the kitchen between trips to the laundry when Abby walked up once again and sweetly asked, “Mommy, can we take Birdie on a walk?” I think I sighed and with a somewhat frustrated breath said something about all of the different things we needed to get done and apologized for how busy we were. Her shoulders lowered a little, and she said, “OK,” while walking away. For the first time, I had looked at her when she asked me about walking the dog. I stopped and asked her, “Abby, do you really want to walk the dog or is it that you really want to talk to me?” My little nine-year-old looked up at me with her big brown eyes and said, “Both.” Teary-eyed Mommy immediately dropped everything and said, “Let’s go now!”

Thank God, I finally listened. As much as I love my dog and walks with her, there were so many “things” that needed to be done over the weekend. There just didn’t seem to be time. But this wasn’t really about walking the dog; it was about my daughter. If I had stopped long enough to be honest, I would have realized there is time for it all. The “things” are not totally important, the ones we love are.

Thank God, I finally listened. Abby asking me to walk the dog that day felt like some sort of request for child entertainment akin to can I play with glitter, can I make this 98-step jewelry kit that requires a hot glue gun, can you take me to Chuck E. Cheese, etc. I wasn’t listening. I wasn’t paying attention to the way she was asking me. I didn’t realize that Abby didn’t know how to say, “I need some time with you to talk.”

Thank God, I finally listened. My little girl needed to establish a way to connect with me that included her unique independence while gaining some perspective from a trusted source. I didn’t think about how a walk with Birdie and mom would give her special time to talk during a fun activity that both took off the pressure of a sit down heart-to-heart and also didn’t include little brother and daddy.

Thank God, I finally listened because she still asks me to go on walks with Birdie.

My own daddy, who worked more hours than I can imagine took time to walk to the end of the street and back with me and my sisters when he got home before the sun set. We all remember the watermelon swing, the trampoline at the end of the street and the turn back up the hill. We still call him to talk because he listens.

Dear God, Sometimes we really need to stop and listen. Please give us the strength and compassion to do so with our whole hearts. Thank you for this great gift!

With love and light,

LT

The Force Be With You

I am not the fanatic that my sister is nor do I come close to my son or my husband’s expertise, but I do love Star Wars and kept a goofy grin on my face throughout most of the new Force Awakens as I watched it with my husband and children.

My son and I also greatly enjoy curling up on Saturday mornings to watch the new Star Wars Rebels cartoons. And even before he somewhat patiently began begging for a Star Wars Advent calendar, I was already feeling compelled to buy him one.

I am glad that he has fallen in love with the Star Wars series and enjoy hearing him talking with his friends through the issues of the movies and books. I hear echoes of the same conversations and debates that my sister and I shared playing in the front yard or gathered around the playground with our friends.

To talk through the trials and tribulations of the Rebellion is to consider the ultimate battle of light and dark and of good and evil. It raises the question of hierarchy, domination or superiority in society and how to give hope and show bravery, kindness and empathy when faced with fear and challenges in life.

The Rebels aren’t out for gain or glory; they are fighting for fairness and the right to life. There is a great beauty to the Rebellion’s protection of the innocent as well as the preservation of creation. Moving beyond ego to recognize the good of the whole certainly is a powerful story that rises again and again.

The movies and book emphasize a higher positive power that cannot be seen but can be felt and believed in with faith. The Force enables individuals to realize their true gifts and to use them to combat the dark side. It empowers simple people to greatness, and strength comes from believing. Even when facing great obstacles, the characters of Star Wars realize that The Force is with them, and they courageously charge to take their stand against the dark side. “May the Force be with you” is repeated time and time again. Knowing The Force is on their side, they have hope.

In Hank Stuever’s article “George Lucas: To feel the true force of ‘Star Wars” for the Washington Post on December 5, 2015, he wrote, “Lucas wanted to make a movie that would teach children the central ethic of right and wrong, good and evil. ‘I want[ed] to see if I can bend their lives at a particular point in time when they’re very vulnerable,’ he recalls, ‘and give them the things that we’ve always given kids throughout history. The last time we had done it was with the Western. And once the Western was gone, there was no vehicle to say, ‘You don’t shoot people in the back’ and such.’”

While recently watching Disney’s “Legacy” episode of Star Wars Rebels with my son, Ezra, one of the show’s main characters, had a vision of his parents from whom he had been separated and who he sadly realized must be dead.

“You are going to need to stay strong…,” said his father. His mother continued, “Remember, Ezra, without hope we have nothing.”

As Ezra considered the loss of his parents and the task facing the Rebel force, his mentor Kanan said to him, “The Jedi teach that life doesn’t cease at death but merely changes form with The Force. Your parents are alive in you, Ezra; they will be always.”

Each Sunday, our family and many more across the world greet each other saying “Peace be with you.” We are purposely making the effort to connect and to remember and realize that we are all a part of the great Kingdom. There is strength and comfort to be found in this shared community and story, and it does not end with death. We each have the peace of God within us to celebrate the joy of life and to challenge the dark side.

The story of the Kingdom is repeated again and again; it is ongoing. Generations take time to nurture the story in their children. Star Wars. Jesus. They are good stories.

The Peace be with you. The Force be with you. Have hope. 

With love and light, 

LT